Woman

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Women are stupid.

The term "woman" is derived from the Bible, where everyone's favorite bearded asskicker God ripped a rib out of the first man and created his female counterpart. Unfortunately, this first woman was a bit of a dunce and was tempted by a serpent (not the one attached to Adam's groin). Thus were they banished to a barren wasteland, which legend states is somewhere just outside of Topeka, Kansas.

Though women ruined the world for their masculine counterparts, they are the most highly sought after commodity in modern civilization. There are several rational reasons why.

Contents 1 Boobs 2 Vaginas 3 The Clitoris and Orgasm 4 Internet Perspectives 5 Women At The Workplace

Boobs

Boobs are fleshy sacks which house the mammary glands, by which nourishing milk is created. None of that really matters though, because they are fun to squeeze and gaze at longingly, a fact proven by the continued success of the Girls Gone Wild series and Internet pornography. It is not possible for them to be be "too big." That is simply a myth made up by flat chested women, feminists, plastic surgeons, and Gays

Vaginas

If boobs are a man's silver, than the vagina is surely a man's gold. Every second of every day the male human seeks to insert his penis into this mysterious orifice. Women, however, do not share this desire with the opposite sex. They wield the awesome power their genitalia holds for monetary gain and the attention required to satisfy their constantly changing desires.

Women have a vaginal defense system against men called vagina dentata. Inside the vagina is a full set of razor sharp teeth which will quickly sever any undesirable penetration (i.e., YOUR PENIS).

Many vaginas carry hidden STDs, and occasionally act as canals through which babies pass. This is always an accident. Coat hangers are an effective solution to this problem.

The Clitoris and Orgasm

These are myths and do not exist.

Internet Perspectives

There are no women on the Internet. Therefore, it is entirely appropriate to point out that women are all sluts, because they are.

Women At The Workplace

Women are paid 10% less than men because they bitch and moan about there not being a stove anywhere near them. They are also required to wear rubber gloves and carry windex at all times cuz them windows ain't gunna wash them damn selves.