Walt Disney

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Walt Disney is stupid.

Walt Disney is the evil genius behind such dastardly acts as creating paedophilia. Today, he is recognised as the world's original super-villain. Acts of his villiany include creating communist propaganda in the form of cute, endearing cartoons aimed at children, and inciting racial hatred (but these days, who doesn't?).

Walt, as a super villain, originally had big plans laid out for Disneyland. First was the complete destruction of Los Angeles and the subsequent rise of Disneyland, the world recreated in his image. Sleeping Beauty's castle was to be the grand and evil fortress of the new nation of Disney, with Walt ruling over the land perched atop. Walt expected that the United States would launch a full assault on his burgeoning secessionist nation. He predicted that while he couldn't win a true war with the United States he could make up for it with guerrilla attacks using the brainwashed children from the Micky Mouse club as his minions. Walt never followed through with his grand plan, mainly because of his newfound obsession with the furry subculture, which he can rightly claim to have helped create.

Walt was famously cryogenically frozen by his drinking buddy Santa Claus in order to be re-animated (ha irony!) many years later. This is because he was a fucking party animal and needed to get laid in different millenia. Walt Disney, prize cad.