Tatu

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Tatu is stupid.

TATU is a band consisting of two useless individuals pretending they can sing with their tits.

Early Story

Once upon a time in Russia, some retards decided to attempt an early version of the inferior and foolish TV-show Idols. After a while, they had narrowed the search down to only 10 people (8 homosexuals and two crew members who were forced to fill the empty spots).

Of course, due to the fact that the whole idea was already retarded, they decided to go all the way and pick the worst of the bunch as winners, and having already eliminated all contestants with brains by setting up their auditions as a talent show (read: loser magnet). This is how TATU was formed.

Music

Very few people know that TATU was actually the main component in the torture used at Guantanamo. The guards quickly developed strange physical symptoms, not unlike those seen in cases of steroid abuse. Luckily, once the human rights organizations figured out what was going on, the TATU torture was stopped immediately, and replaced with more humane measures such as thumb screws, electrocution, sleep deprivation, and sexual degredation.

Sexuality controversy

Because they failed so immensely, TATU's managers attempted serveral approaches, including making a song with the band "Rammstein", and having prementioned band's singer do all the vocals, except two or three words in the background of every chorus. However, this was not enough, so they resorted to the only thing hot girls can do when they're untalented and broke: Prostitution. Now, as this alone wasn't enough, they decided to sell themselves as lesbians by kissing each other on stage, which inevitably lead to about a thousand magazines writing articles about how homosexual TATU were. Sadly, this didn't help one bit. TATU remains something nerds and emos used to fap to when they were 13, but even these underpeople have grown away from it.