Talk:Republican

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

The republican party was founded by President Eisenhower in the 1500's as a way to create an orwellian society with forced cousin marriage. President Eisenhower was assembled from 20 red-headed Armenian flesh donors with a modified gamecube with Luigi's Mansion running nonstop for a brain. Co-founders include Coca-cola, the famous iced beverage factory and crew, and Robert Luccio, who discovered country music in Kenya, when his fan-powered chute ripped and he landed in bushlander territory, only to find black people. Their rhythmic drum beating frightened him so much that the so-called "tresspassers of white ownings" began to yodel to calm him down.

The republican party, once corrupt and irregular in beliefs, is now mafia-owned. After the Italians put "Dem' On!" the boat here, they sought to change the outlook of their business into a Repu-man front. The mafia often changes age-related sex laws based on the scientific findings of the Don via the Republican National Commitee.

The average republican outlook on molestation is that you can't change things in this world, so don't change it. Also, we all remember the famed speech given at the Republican Grotto For the Prohibition of Abortion, which starts, "If an incested man brought me coffee, I wouldn't say anything."