Mexico

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Mexico is stupid.

Mexico is like Spain, only Mexican. Mexico (Spanish La Republica Mexicana) is a communist, or possibly Lesbian, nation of North America, bordered to the north by the United States, to the east by the Gulf of Mexico, to the west by the Pacific Ocean, and to the south by the United Federation of Guatemala. Its inhabitants are known as Mexicans. Mexicans are all born with the ability to clear fences in a single leap. Most have the surnames Rodriguez or Sanchez. All Mexican children are named "Meja" or "Mejo". They retain these names until they are old enough to partake in the celebration known as a Quinceanera. At this celebration five names are placed in a hat. The child then randomly picks one. This is why all Mexicans seem to have the same first name, because only five names truly exist.

Mexico's exports include diarrhea, Santeria, landscapers, construction workers, hotel cleaning ladies, farm workers, illegal nannies, sombereos, tequila, Chicklets and, of course, the Mexican Doorbell. All of these things Americans say they hate but secretly couldn't do without, particularly the diarrhea. Although they do love the food, they don't want to have to give citizenship to the guy cooking it.

Mexico is expected to be destroyed by the Second Coming of Jesus as foretold in Revelation 13:22, wherein Christ says "I'm fucking serious you guys, I'm back, and I'll blow up the land of brown people to prove it." This could also be referring to Brooklyn, but my moneys on Mexico.

Sadly, Mexicans actually produce slightly more women than men. This is one more reason it sucks to be Mexican. Since the entire population of Mexico is expected to relocated to the United States sometime in the Future, the USA appears to be doomed to be a complete sausage party coast to coast.