Harry Potter

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Harry Potter is stupid.

Harry Potter is a well-known magician, but his major job is to make sure that JK Rowling becomes the wealthiest person on the planet. However, in slang Dutch, the word "Potter" means "homosexual".

Just the language in these books is enough to make one wonder if JK Rowling was on acid when she wrote these novels for simpering retards. Words like "Muggle? Man that just sounds like what happens when you are mugged by a midget! Will someone PLEASE tell me what a dumbledore is?? Did Rowling spend time in Japan and wrote these stupid books in the "Engrish" language? Or are these terms the sounds made from her ass when she watches the video of Mr. Hands?

Then you get this subculture of asshats that imitate characters in the books while waiting in line to get into the newest movie or in line to buy the next book. Why just the thought of grown people waiting in line for days to buy a book written for children is enough to make one want to drink until they die from alcohol poisoning.

In fact, when you look at the entire phenomenon that is Harry Potter, you realize just how wide spread the threat of pedophiles really is! The pedophile movement is WORLDWIDE! No child is safe when an adult is showing interest in Harry Potter. Or is it the glasses that Harry Potter wears that makes grown people horny?

Now what is really stupid, is the fact that in the books, Harry never gets older, yet they keep recasting the same children to play the characters in the movies and they age. Am I the only one that knows this? Or is the average Harry Potter fan that ignorant?

I want to slap the next person that tells me that Harry is existential. Even Worf off of Star Trek isn't existential. Cookie Monster off of Seasame Street is more existential than Harry Potter and his merry band of numb-nuts that fly around on brooms and play a game that was invented by the Mayans to determine who gets sacrificed next.

And what is up with these two houses in this "special" school that Harry and pals are enrolled in? And why do none of the "little wizards" ever show up at the door of the school in a short bus when they are deemed "special" by the Grand High Poobah of Upper Buttcrack? Oh wait, the way to get to the School is by walking into a wall in the subway station. Yeah, opium wasn't used by Rowlings when she wrote this! (By the way, I know that opium was used by J. Danforth Quayle when he tried to spell the word "Tomato" at a school spelling bee!)

Even Adolph Hitler reads the Harry Potter books and likes to dress up in costume while walking the streets of England, as he pretends to be unnoticed by the untrained eye.

Harry Potter fans are stupid and should be shot on sight! The only way to rid yourself of a Harry Potter fan raving about how great is the book or the movie? Why that's simple, tell them that Rowlings is a pedophile and you are an undercover INTERPOL officer that is there to arrest them for aiding and abetting a well known felon.