Football
From Encyclopedia Of Stupid
Football is stupid.
But everybody likes it because its FOOTBALL! FOOTBALL! FOOTBALL!!!!!!1111!1!ONEANDALLTHATSHIT!!1!
Contents |
FOOTBALL!
The Rules of Football!
Who Plays Football?
We Get It Already Fucker
No you don't. You like FOOTBALL! You don't understand anything.
The History of Football!
Originally developed in Germany sometime before 1975 the sport known as football evolved from a game developed by the Nazi Party. They developed this brutal game to promote teamwork and conditioning for their soldiers. In its early days the game was played with the dismembered foot of Russian POWs (hence the term "football"). Soon teams began forming throughout the entire Third Reich and the Nazi party formed the first football league, The Nazi Football League, which today is often abbreviated "NFL."
Under the Carter administration American soldiers returned from the second world war and brought the knowledge of this new sport to their home country. The sport did not catch mainstream America's attention until legendary promoter Don King became involved and secretly paid canine pop sensation Janet Jackson to expose her six chesticles during the halftime break of the championship game (known as the World Series).
Janet Jackson's surprise bronze nuggets flash was well received by families and community leaders across the country and finally put football on the map. Some of the original German terms are still used in football today, such as "sudden death" overtime and the defensive "blitz."
PUNT'D!
In 2007, Houston Nutt quit bossing around TEH HAWGS and went back to his life previous to TEH HAWGS--stripping on a pole in Dallas while squealing like a pig. I could make a joke about his last name here, but see this? Class. ((But just in case: NUTTSACK NUTTSACK NUTTSACK SOOEEE!!!!!!!!!!11!!1!ELEVENGIGGLE!))
