Diet Coke

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Diet Coke is stupid.

Diet Coke is an addictive drug invented by the Jews in 1984, as a biological weapon in the Cola Wars. The Illuminati controlled both Coke and it's archrival Pepsi, and use the 'war' to further popularize the beverages. In conjunction with the whores Madonna and Paula Abdul, as well as the child molester Michael Jackson, the Illuminati and the Jews created a mainstream inescapable pop-culture juggernaut. Their domination of culture was prevelant, here is a sample 80's conversation:

80's person #1: Diet Coke is better than Diet Pepsi
80's person #2: No, Diet Pepsi is better than Diet Coke. Madonna drinks Diet Pepsi.
80's person #1: Diet Coke is better, Micheal Jackson said so at Disney.
80's person #2: Opposites Attract, Captain Crunch, Miami Vice.

The Illuminati got the power, the whores got exposure, MJ got to build a child-fucking palace, and the Jews got money. Everyone was happy.

Later Ramifications

Of course, like when the government created AIDS and Fried chicken, the drug took on a big stupid life of its own.

The most stupid thing about Diet Coke is that fat people love it.

Also Diet Coke gives you cancer.

And if you drop a Mentos in a 2-liter bottle of Diet Coke it explodes.