Anorexia

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Anorexia is stupid.

It is an eating "disorder" that's very fashionable nowadays. Because, you know, disorders are, like, totally in right now. They even have a cute nickname for it, Ana. It usually affects girls, but it can also affect sissies.

Contents 1 What is anorexia? 2 You Think That's Sad? 3 Bulimia 4 Known alternatives to Ana and Mia 5 Famous Crazy Ana/Mia Bitches

What is anorexia?

Anorexia is when a fat ass sees all those skinny models, looks at herself and realizes the obvious: she's fat and nobody likes her because of that. Therefore, even more obviously, she concludes that if she stops eating, she'll get thin. So she decides to close shut the fat-dripping sugary gaping hole of her mouth and simply stops eating at all, or eats very little. You know, like a leaf of lettuce and stuff. Normally this would be a good thing, because nobody likes fat people. I mean, they occupy space, they eat a lot, they stink (because they can't wash up the accumulating dirty in the fat flaps in their chubby bodies) and they make the government have to spend money on them with all their health problems. However, anorexics don't know when to stop. Probably that is why they got fat to begin with. So they keep getting thinner and thinner and thinner until they disappear. And even after they become a pile of bones, they still think they're fat.

You Think That's Sad?

It's not. Dying because you have food and you don't want to eat it because you're a weak, crazy bitch who wants to fit in a stupid dress is not sad.

Bulimia

Ana has a friend, Mia (short for bulimia, asshat). Bulimia differs from anorexia because bulimics lack the willpower of anorexics to remain hours without feeling the tasty, tasty fat going down their gluttonous throats. So instead of not eating at all, bulimics will eat all the food they can and then feel guilty and puke it all out - making it even more stupid than anorexia. Also, this fucks your throat and teeth up.

Known alternatives to Ana and Mia

If you want to lose weight healthily, you can do so without resorting to anorexia or bulimia, by developing the following habits:

• Crack
• Cocaine
• Meth
• Smoking
• A balanced diet and regular exercising
• Heroin
• Jesus
• Gut mutilation Gastric surgery
• AIDS
• The moon diet
• The Cosmopolitan diet

Famous Crazy Ana/Mia Bitches

• Calista Flockhart
• Victoria Beckham
• Kate Moss
• Amy Winehouse
• Mary-Kate Olsen
• Nicole Richie
• Geri Halliwell
• Lindsey Lohan

And many more people stupid teenagers worship.